Out of the Mouths of Moms

Sometimes...don't you just hear just what you need to hear as you talk to your kids? Or your dogs?

There are several examples, but the other day, my littlest dog was yapping up a storm. She had water, food, and a treat...I think she just needed to be put to bed, so she could feel safe. (She is a retired breeder dog, never properly loved or socialized and has some related issues.)

"Angel, you have everything you need! Why are you fussing?"

I admit it. My own words apply to me. As I have shared in past entries, I am really praying about a way to bring in some income. At times, I am sure the Lord feels I am fussing about it. My own words caused me to stop and quiet my heart a little. We DO have everything we need. Why am I getting agitated, instead of peacefully and enthusiastically looking for the answer?

We DO need to rebuild a bit...I DO see some valid needs that some additional income would address. I DO want to serve my family with the strength and health the Lord has granted me. Yet, I am challenged by my own words, especially as I consider some of my own blogged words a couple of entries ago: part of healing is enjoying life.

Thus, my goal and what is on my heart: To stop fussing...to embrace the safety and met needs the Lord has provided...and, happily and joyfully and with excitement--not agitation--continue to explore my options. And the Lord does seem to be presenting some possibilities...but I am holding my tongue for now--which may be part of my "unhealth", but I will save my timidity and self-consciousness for another blog! But, hopefully, in the process, until I find the courage to blog about it, I will regain some ground toward joyfully problem-solving!

Carpel Tunnel Report

I accomplished my nerve conduction test yesterday.

My experience: "unpleasantly ok." If you can imagine someone taking a blunt instrument (like the one they use to test reflexes) and sharply hitting you several times, that was what it felt like to me. It hurt, but was not excruciating, and it did not burn. I was a little achy afterward, and tired, but it seems like pain makes me tired, so perhaps that is just me. My left side was more painful than the right (my right side is worse, so perhaps the nerves are more clogged up). It's not hard to imagine, though, that someone who has a low pain-thresh-hold, or who has not experienced much pain, would find the test a little more severe.

There were no needles involved, which a couple of people had made me expect, but mine was done with electrical shocks. As I was laying there, I kept thinking, "Someday, history will look back and find this barbaric!" Oh the joys of being on the front-end (assuming it IS new-ish) of emerging technology! And for a little bit of irony...that evening as I channel-surfed, what did I come across but "The One Who Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest." I always HATED that shock-treatment scene! Now I know why!

The results: Of course, I have to wait. But, he was willing to say he is fairly certain my right hand does have carpel tunnel. The left side is not as bad, and he has to look more closely at the results. And, I had to chuckle...the nurse gave me my follow-up appointment and I had to say, "Sorry--that's not going to work for me." For most people, they would be out of town or getting their hair done. Me: I'm having surgery that day! But, on August 30th, three days after my surgery, we should get the results.

The treatment: Surgery is a possibility, but we don't know yet. Cock-up splints, yes--though they are unpleasant to wear at night, in my experience. If it does result in surgery, it is just a day surgery...a little snip to the tendon, and voila'--done! Not so bad, except for the cost of it.

A Pick-Me-Up

There are some questions that I should probably just not ask, and this is probably one of them. But, just how bad did I look when I had cancer??

The reason I ask is this: It seems like an overwhelming majority of the people I run into have the same question and comment: "How are you? Well, you look just GREAT!!"

I know that I was bald, with no eyebrows or eyelashes, but, really now....well, okay....maybe I did look just a tad sick. :-)

I AM laughing as I write this. I love the encouragement of others and their care and concern. I love it that they noticed I wasn't looking so perky, and I love it that they notice that I look better. No, I look GREAT! Now, there's a pick-me-up! (I'm not packing my bags and entering any Ms. _________ pageants, but I will take GREAT when I get it!)

Thanks, Lord, for folks who see me and take time to care...thanks that You see me and care as well!

On a Monday Morning...

It is a Monday morning....

This week I have the nerve conduction test for my Carpel Tunnel on Wednesday. I have heard two things....that it is NOT pleasant, and that it is not that big of a deal. My guess is that it depends on the amount of nerve damage...i.e., the more nerve damage the less painful. But that's just my guess. I will report in! I can say that I have been dropping a lot of things, so I am interested in seeing how my experience matches up with the test results.

We are also trying to keep reminded that I have the surgery to remove the nodule on my thyroid at the end of the month. Though I will probably spend one night in the hospital, it doesn't seem like a big deal to me. It did cross my mind the other day that the surgery is on my NECK, with some pretty major arteries in the area.... :-) , but I won't go there.

Apart from that, since I have written this far, I would now really like to say something profound. Really I would. But I just don't have it. Perhaps because it is Monday morning...perhaps because it is Monday morning AFTER we hosted our small group from church last night....and perhaps because there are lots of things to accomplish and it is only Monday morning. Fortunately, my house is clean from hosting last night, so that is a blessing! Perhaps profound and tired just don't mix!

Yet, as I think about it, perhaps it is not that I want to say something profound...this morning, I would like to HEAR something profound. There are words I would like to hope for about several situations...about my bringing income into the family, about school choices for our youngest, about my neck pain (my doctor ordered more PT rather than an x-ray or scan of some sort, which is what I would like), about....well there are just several things. It is not that I am necessarily worried, but there are times that you just want to be on the other side of a situation and hear that it all worked as you hoped.

Especially on a Monday morning.