Just Some Thoughts
Today was my last day of Bible Study Fellowship. It officially ends next Wednesday, but since I am doing my chemotherapy on Tuesday, I am not planning on going. As well, there is no childcare for the last session, so I would be home anyway. But, as we closed out the year, I had a couple of thoughts:
...We studied Genesis, and
I am challenged to ask God for BIG things. For example, every now and then I still find myself talking to the Lord in terms of "Okay...if I can just have 10 years, Annaleigh would be 13. No, that's a terrible age to loose a Mom...better make it 17...no, 18 years, so that Ellabeth would be 20." First of all, my cancer is more curable than that, and that mindset is not really appropriate. Secondly, Creation and God's Promises teach me to ask BIG. So, I catch myself and ask for another 50 or years. Why not live until I'm 90+??
...We also looked at the life of Jacob, the man who clung to God and insisted on His blessing. When I think of that story, I also think of the story of God meeting Hagar and Ishmael in the desert, and providing for them so they would not die. The story says that God was with them.
I am challenged by this in a huge way. I confess I do not understand how God was with them, yet Ishmael was not part of God's covenant of promise. But I am paying attention. I want to be like Jacob. I want to live through this cancer and seek and find God and His blessings. I want to cling to Him and seek not just an awareness that He exists, but I want to know Him more. I want to ask BIG--and develop a deeper relationship with Him...to seek the blessings of His promises, not just His presence.
...And, I will never look at stickers the same way.
Scripture teaches that thorns and stickers were the result of the fall, and I realized I have a yard full of them to remind me that sin occurred in this world! Every time my puppies carry one in, I am reminded that sin was not God's idea...that Jesus bore on His head that symbol of sin as He went to the cross. I am so grateful that His death on that cross flung the crown of thorns--and my sin-- away. Thank you, Lord.
...Finally, I am grateful that "in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose..." Romans 8:28. As we concluded Genesis, the words of Joseph rang loud and clear: What you intended for evil, God intended for good, for the saving the many lives."
I am grateful that God can use my cancer, and other difficult things, to bring about His purpose. Though satan may intend difficult times to thwart the work of God in my life, or to douse my faith, God is faithful. He will have the upper hand. He will use these things for my good. He will NOT allow what is intended for evil to destroy the work He began in me. I am amazed, humbled and grateful, and I want to cooperate with Him in this!
...We studied Genesis, and
I am challenged to ask God for BIG things. For example, every now and then I still find myself talking to the Lord in terms of "Okay...if I can just have 10 years, Annaleigh would be 13. No, that's a terrible age to loose a Mom...better make it 17...no, 18 years, so that Ellabeth would be 20." First of all, my cancer is more curable than that, and that mindset is not really appropriate. Secondly, Creation and God's Promises teach me to ask BIG. So, I catch myself and ask for another 50 or years. Why not live until I'm 90+??
...We also looked at the life of Jacob, the man who clung to God and insisted on His blessing. When I think of that story, I also think of the story of God meeting Hagar and Ishmael in the desert, and providing for them so they would not die. The story says that God was with them.
I am challenged by this in a huge way. I confess I do not understand how God was with them, yet Ishmael was not part of God's covenant of promise. But I am paying attention. I want to be like Jacob. I want to live through this cancer and seek and find God and His blessings. I want to cling to Him and seek not just an awareness that He exists, but I want to know Him more. I want to ask BIG--and develop a deeper relationship with Him...to seek the blessings of His promises, not just His presence.
...And, I will never look at stickers the same way.
Scripture teaches that thorns and stickers were the result of the fall, and I realized I have a yard full of them to remind me that sin occurred in this world! Every time my puppies carry one in, I am reminded that sin was not God's idea...that Jesus bore on His head that symbol of sin as He went to the cross. I am so grateful that His death on that cross flung the crown of thorns--and my sin-- away. Thank you, Lord.
...Finally, I am grateful that "in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose..." Romans 8:28. As we concluded Genesis, the words of Joseph rang loud and clear: What you intended for evil, God intended for good, for the saving the many lives."
I am grateful that God can use my cancer, and other difficult things, to bring about His purpose. Though satan may intend difficult times to thwart the work of God in my life, or to douse my faith, God is faithful. He will have the upper hand. He will use these things for my good. He will NOT allow what is intended for evil to destroy the work He began in me. I am amazed, humbled and grateful, and I want to cooperate with Him in this!
posted by Beverly @ 1:38 PM
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